Goodbye California?

For whatever reason, the news has been all excited lately about all the earthquakes and junk we've been having. Maybe it's all left over worry about tsunami's and stuff from last December. Maybe it's just a slow news day. Or maybe some people's prayers are being answered and CALIFORNIA IS GETTING READY TO FALL INTO THE OCEAN.

What would it mean if California fell into the ocean? Well, ocean front property in Nevada for one. Maybe an end to crappy summer blockbusters, but for some reason I doubt that. Wouldn't have to worry about the California Raisins making a comeback. Technically, it would mean no more Californians, but they'd just migrate to other places and try change those places into their former homeland. Oh, never mind, that's already happening.

One good thing would happen, and this one thing makes total sense. No more California hockey teams. What the fuck is Southern California doing with a hockey team, let alone the whole state having two? How many hockey teams are left in Canada? Surely not as many as there are in California, Texas and Florida! Florida has two for crying out loud! When was the last time they had snow? The fucking stone age? Before Ancient Americans hunted the wooly mammoth and everything else into extinction? When? Dammmit tell me when?

At any rate, I doubt California is falling into the ocean. And if it were, it'd only mean instead of being concentrated in one geographic area, Californians would move all over the place and make the rest of us miserable. So those of you praying for the end of the Golden State, knock that shit off.